3/52

New Month. New Beginning. January did not go as I thought it would, so it’s a restart today. Does this sound familiar to anyone else? I know it does. So let me just point out that at any point and time you are where you are meant to be. God is in control. His plans are different than our plans. It’s okay to start and restart and restart. I have a goal 52 posts for the year, hence the titles for my posts. I have not got a definite plan for how I will get there or what each post will be about. I am giving that over to God. I am learning about myself with each day and evolving with each day as well. I now understand that I will forever be growing and learning and evolving into the person God has instore for me, not the one I thought I’d be. This is the year I evaluate as I go forward; listen more to my heart and soul and less to my ego mind. I still will have days of trouble. I will still feel distress and cry out. I will continue to learn how to manage the trials of human existence. Illness creates hardships that take courage and strength to overcome, let downs and setbacks can destroy motivation. I currently have two very special people in my world living with cancer. Last month was challenging to stay on track with the things I planned for myself. Some things have to give, others take precedence. Relationships at the forefront of my mind, love from my heart to care for and move forward with doing what we can. I cried today. I’m sad that he is sick again. I’m sad to have plans fall apart. I’m sad that life is different than I wanted with my husband. Some days are just tearful, someday everything around me gives my eyes a reason to tear. Emotions, all-encompassing today. All over the place with thoughts. And then I turn to God, asking Him to show me “What would YOU have me know today?” and I open my Bible.
pg 1641 A quote from: The Everyday life Bible under Speak the word.
“God, I will not be anxious and troubled with cares about my life, because I know that I am very valuable to You and that You will take care of me.” [adapted from Luke 12:22-24]
AMEN.
It’s okay to feel emotions. It’s okay, cry and release the pain felt from the emotions you have. God has me at any point and time exactly where I am to be.